Love is a verb – in fairness to Jason he did try to tell me when we were dating that love was a choice more than a feeling. I was horrified and told him it was the most unromantic thing I’d ever heard. I set myself a challenge to prove him wrong. He did fall head over heels for me shortly after but continued to prove that love is a verb, a choice, an action right up until today. The feelings of love ebb and flow and circumstances, mood and notions have an impact. But when we choose to love from an act of our will it’s a solid thing that lays a foundation for the harder years which will come.
Keeping the rules and being a good Christian does not equal happy ever after and a handsome Prince on a horse. That is definitely more Disney than scripture. What my faith in Jesus for all those years did do though was teach me to recognise when God shows up because I know who He is. Marriage has taught us that when He promised to never leave us He meant it. That when He told us that no circumstance in heaven or earth could separate us from His love we could totally trust that as truth. When the storms in our life have raged; storms of heartbreak, grief, disappointment and sickness have broke out against us we have found that God is our solid foundation and our faith in who He is the house that we find ourselves safe in.
Promises are easy to make but hard to keep.
We stood 2 very young 24 &25 yr olds and took our vows with seriousness and hope before God and those we loved. We meant every word, but what we didn’t know is that those promises need exercised daily to remain true. That even when you break them they don’t have to break beyond repair. Promises are mendable, that’s as long as you want to mend them. Just start keeping them again and the fibres of the promises are strengthened. Like broken bones they mend with time, patience and care.
Our family of 5 would be EVERYTHING
We had absolutely no idea just how much we’d love being parents. 18 months after the first dance Caleb made us Da & Mama. Before he was born we wondered if we’d love him enough – how crazy that seems to even write. The moment we heard his heartbeat in utero, saw the first scan and held him in our arms our hearts where his forever. Then with Micah we worried that we wouldn’t have enough love for 2 – again the craziness of that idea, all over again we got a whole new heart full of love for Mickey. And then came our gift of grace Matthew Jack 11months later making his big brother Micah an Irish twin! We never dreamt that we could love 3 tiny humans this much. As the lads grew into each stage I would announce “oh I love this stage” until eventually I realised I loved every stage with them. Now as young adults we love this stage too. Our family is our sanctuary. When we are hurting, lost or worn out it is the safe place we run too, circle the wagons and we draw each other close. We look at them now and we can’t believe these amazing humans came from us. Young men full of compassion, creativity, resilience, intelligence and strength.
Intimate equals vulnerable
We entered marriage wide eyed and crazy about each other. The intimacy we hoped for though was 2 dimensional. Disappointment and heartache lead us to raw, fully open, vulnerable truth telling that healed our wounds and lead us to discover an intimacy that brought us to tears. There are no short cuts or hiding places. True intimacy of heart, soul and body requires trust that is given and cherished. The person we go to for accountability for everything in our lives is each other. We made this promise early doors and we keep it still. Vulnerable, open and honest accountability equals intimacy in our marriage.
Our Soundtrack Chelle loves Jasy Playlist
Michelle Scott 