Ash Valentine Wednesday

I overheard a conversation in our tea room about how inconvenient it was that Ash Wednesday fell on Valentines day this year, it made me chuckle. Often God intersects my life at the most inconvenient times. Like inviting us to plant a church when we had 3,4 &5 year old sons. Like asking us to reach out into Armagh with a campus when Jason’s dad was terminally ill. Like when i’m ordering my breakfast in a cafe and the little lady beside me starts telling about her arthritic pain, doctors appointment and suddenly losing her brother in law 3 weeks before and I know that I have to pray for her, but really God don’t you see I’m in for a quick breakfast and diary scheduling with J and its all a bit awkward and embarrassing. Or the time during Holy week prayer room when I was busy doing the church accounts and my friend kept insisting I come and hear her prayer and I thought “wise up just pray”, but God you insisted I go sit with her and in that moment she gave her life to you. Interruptions to my plans, my schedule, like the beginning of Lent on Valentines Day.

Father, you are interrupting my plans for celebrating love with a reminder of what Ash Wednesday symbolises. It links back to a Jewish tradition of wearing sackcloth and ashes as a sign of penance. It’s a reminder that we are from dust and to dust we will return. It’s an opportunity to repent. That’s what I woke up thinking of this morning. I accept that my sins are forgiven once and for all; past, present and future through Jesus. But there is a hidden power in confessing our sins that leads to breaking the hold that sin can have over us and when we already know Jesus as our Saviour we confess in the assurance that we are already forgiven. The act of repentance actually reminds us of who we are, not sinners anymore but the redeemed. Repentance is not just a saying ‘I’m sorry’ but a determination to live a holy life, to do a u-turn from sin and turn towards grace and righteousness. Repentance breaks the power of the habitual sins that enslave us and steal our already won freedom.

Today I am choosing both. Celebrating love and repentance. Actually finding that I’m loved deeply in both, accepted fully as I am. This Ash Valentine Wednesday I’m walking in love preparing to u-turn where I need to; living beloved, cherished, forgiven and redeemed.